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Sam's TSM Testimony

I got permission from Sam Goding to share his TSM testimony. Here is his story.

Alcohol use disorder (AUD) was not something I woke up with and discovered, although at the time, it sure felt that way. My name is Sam, I’m forty-nine years old, I live in Darwin Australia and until recently I had been a daily drinker for the past thirty years. Not a strange story, plenty of people live long lives and drink daily, right?

I considered myself a happy drunk, I never caused trouble nor got into any. So, what’s the problem? Right?

Like all untreated disorders, things slowly but surely got worse for me. The last six months (before TSM) of drinking, I was not eating, exercising, working, or socializing in any way, shape or form. The volume of alcohol had progressed to lethal levels. I was lucky to be alive drinking three liters of vodka a day as well as six premixed-packaged cans – approximately 110 standard drinks a day.

I lost all sense of humanity. I had impaired judgment and movement, slurred speech, loss of balance, coordination and reflexes. Sleep was often a twenty-minute nap before waking for more to drink. I would vomit water and keep down vodka, my mind and body were 100% dependent on alcohol to survive or function – albeit at minimal levels. I was more negatively affected by not drinking than by drinking at this point. There was no "off button" or way to stop safely – risking seizures and death.

On January 7, 2018, I woke on the kitchen floor in a pool of dried blood, unable to tell how long I'd been there. I suffered a ruptured abdominal hernia which was hemorrhaging. I learned later that the blood becomes so depleted of nutrients, phosphates, magnesium and potassium, that it thins to anaemic levels. I was rushed to the hospital and survived the ordeal, just barely.

I was in the hospital, recuperating, for two weeks (the longest I had gone without a drink) and given regular doses of Valium to help me get through the detoxing. I was on constant IV drips to replenish my blood. I nearly expired on the first night and the third night – some of the nurses and doctors getting me in touch with my parents for final goodbyes. What kept me alive? I do not know.

I was visited by drug and alcohol experts daily and was eventually convinced to enter rehab on the 21st of January. I spent five months there and wanted a drink more and more as time went on. The day they released me, I was drinking again.

I sought help through Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), Grow Mental Health Groups, counseling and medication to supposedly stop the cravings. I did have some success – never returning to the lethal levels of drinking I once knew, however, I was increasingly frustrated that I couldn’t last more than a couple of weeks before the cravings overwhelmed me again. I battled my way through the next two years, white knuckling it as much as I could bare. I attended meeting after meeting, counseling and G.P.s – I had test after test, however, nothing known to me could ease the cravings that were simply impossible to resist.

Toward the end of 2020, I stumbled on a documentary called, "The 13th Step." It featured a brief cameo of Claudia Christian, which caught my eye. I scrambled to the computer to research as much as I could about the Sinclair Method (TSM). I soon found the documentary "One Little Pill" which captivated me from start to finish. I must have watched it five times. I also downloaded the audible book "The Cure for Alcoholism" and knew I had to give this a try...after all, I had nothing to lose.

On February 8th 2021, I began TSM. I had the support of three close friends, however, no support from the medical fraternity or from AA could be found.

I found instant success with TSM.

Over the following three weeks, I only had three beers a night and a couple of alcohol-free days inter-spliced. I was quick to share with the TSM Facebook community and was filled with confidence that I was on the right track. I would only purchase what I planned to drink, no more, and made a point of selecting drinks I would not normally consume. I would leave the drink in another room, and wander in occasionally to take a sip. And I always, always, took 50mg of naltrexone one hour before I had a drink. I thought to myself, "I got this."

After week three, however, I discovered that my new found confidence was lulling me into a false sense of security. I could try vodka, I thought, stupidly. I found I could quickly drink through the effect of the naltrexone with vodka, rendering it useless. It was a battle to be compliant after that, but I was fiercely determined to get back on track. It did get back on track, albeit with a few bumps here and there – who’s perfect? Right?

On May the 6th I stupidly drank vodka again, however, when I awoke the next morning I felt very, very different. Like, something internally also awoke. From May 7th to today – the 11th of July, I can genuinely tell you that I have had no cravings or desire, whatsoever, to have a drink. 60 days alcohol free (AF). I am so sure that the craving has gone that I can officially declare myself "medically extinct" from the craving, the obsession to drink alcohol.

Of course, I will keep my naltrexone (NAL), within arm’s reach as my safety net. I am so grateful to the C Three Foundation, Claudia Christian, Roy Eskapa PhD and Dr. John D Sinclair for their work and to the three close friends who offered me support without judgement.

Thank you,

Sam Goding

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